Experiments and Apologies

So . . . . a friend of mine suggested to me a while ago that in order for me to get through the stuff from a couple years ago that still really hurts me most nights that I should talk to the last few people that were involved and to start what she called a "total honesty" type thing with everyone else.

With that being said, for the next two weeks, I will willingly talk to anyone about anything that involves my thoughts, my emotions, my actions, my past, and anything else that I can answer.

All that anyone needs to do is just ask a question and I will answer as honestly as I can.

It will be beyond uncomfortable at times but I'm committing to going through with it. Anything is fair game.

And to get it out of the way. . .

I'm sorry to R.P. for all the stuff that was said back in September.

I'm sorry to A.E. for the mess that I started with you before you moved away (I know you can't hear me but I just need to say I'm sorry for all the pain I put you through. I miss you and hopefully I'll see you again soon. R.I.P.).

I'm sorry to R.J.P. for the whole situation with Alex junior year and for not just telling you at the beginning. Maybe things would've been different if I had. You still mean the world to me and I'd do anything for you. I'd do anything to hear you laugh and see your smile. It was good seeing you the other day.

I'm sorry to T.G. for worrying you for thirty one days and I'm glad we don't talk because I wouldn't be a good friend to you. I'm honestly not a good friend for anyone but some can deal with it better than others. You were terrified because of what I was talking about and I'm sorry for that . . . .

I'm sorry to G.F. for not being there for you when you were going through the troubles with your version of the same issues I was dealing with. You were there for me and I should've been there for you. But I'm here now and if you need someone to talk to about it if it comes up again, I'll be here for you.

And lastly, I'm sorry to H.L. for not being the person you need me to be. I know we have our differences but when I talk to you, I get terrified and I can't handle it. So I stopped answering your texts and I won't be answering any any time soon. I'm sorry